Deep Thoughts

Do you have any idea how irritating it is to have music in your soul, but not be able to get it out since you don't have fingers?                                

-- Shane 

Cat Universe

Sometimes I jump to conclusions. (It's the only kind of jumping I do these days.)

I saw this piece of paper, and it said, 'cat universe.' I figured that the little girls who live here were planning to send me to the moon, or outer space, or somewhere else. You know - in the universe.  That's a long way away. Right?

I showed my protest by ripping up their plans.

Turns out they were really just going to make a corner of the living room especially comfy, just for us. They were going to call it, um, Cat Universe.

I'm so ashamed.

-Shane

A Home of My Own

I can't be upstairs much, because Princess won't let me. 

I can't be in the basement much, because, well, Princess won't let me. 

When I'm on the main floor, I end up getting stepped on. (For some reason mom and dad think I'm "underfoot" when I sleep on the kitchen floor.) 

So, I've claimed this box for my own.

It's mine, and no one can take it away from me! (At least, as long as I'm in it, 'cause I'm too heavy to move.)

 - shane

All Thanked Out

I was so glad that Mom and Dad finally came home and let me out of the basement that I wanted to write them a thank you note.

Then I remembered that I didn't know how to spell. Or write. Or open the package of notes.

I took a nap instead. I was thankful for that too, but I won't be writing any notes about it.

- Shane

Bring It!

I know this is where bacon sometimes happens. Now it's just a matter of waiting.

-Shane

Me No Likey

I am not a big fan of being picked up.

-Shane

Hide and Seek

Ha ha! I'm hiding. You'll never find me here!

-Shane

Card Shark

Yesterday I played cards with Princess. She won. Then she threw all the cards at me and yelled, "52 card pickup, loser!"

I didn't like that much.

When I was done cleaning up, I asked her why I lost. She said it's because I was stupid. So, I asked Charles.

He said it was just because Lady Luck wasn't on my side.

I don't know who Lady Luck is, or why she doesn't like me, but I tore up her card.

Take THAT, Lady Luck!

I think I'll stick to playing the piano, instead of playing cards.

-Shane

What's That All About?

Sometimes in the middle of my naps mom will send one of the kids in to put a mirror under my nose. I don't understand why. Do you?

- Shane

Life is Different

Life without Nimrod is strange. I mean, it took me a couple of weeks to notice that he had gone, but once I did, it was just plain weird.

First off, there's more food in the bowl. That part is nice. Plus, now no one jumps out and attacks me when I'm trying to use the litterbox.  I'm really glad about that. I think that the wall, the floor, and my mom are pretty glad about that too.

But, I do kind of miss him coming in and smelling like the outdoors. I liked that. I would wait until he fell asleep, and then sneak up and sniff him. I tried sniffing the people's shoes last week, but it wasn't the same. They just smell like dirt. And feet. That's not as nice.

All in all, though, I think it's better for him, and for us, that he's on the farm now. Princess says I've gotten fatter since he left. Maybe that's true, but she's gotten grumpier. At least fat is fun to cuddle with. No one likes grumpy.

I've got to go. It's almost time for my evening nap, and if I don't get the chair first, Charles will take it. Then it will smell like old man for days.

- Shane

Poke!

For some reason the people have this thing about poking my belly. I can't imagine why...

-Shane

Grueling Grooming

Nimrod got outside today for a few minutes. While he was out there, he rolled in the dirt. He was filthy when he came in. Then he touched me, and I felt filthy too. So, I had to give myself a bath.

I don't think he appreciates how much fur I have, and how long it takes for my grooming. I had to take three naps in the middle of the process, and kept forgetting what had been licked and hadn't. It was exhausting.

I wish he would just be happy being inside. Or, at least quit touching me when he is dirty.

- Shane

Kitty Guilt

On behalf of all of the other cats here, I would just like to tell our readers that Princess does NOT speak for all Farrier felines, especially when it comes to issues of global inequality.

I mean, she is right, that it does suck to be someone who doesn't have food or water. I, personally, cannot even IMAGINE that! That would suck a lot. Like, a whoooole lot. So, I guess she was kind of speaking for us, since I agree with what she said. But... wait. I'm confused again.

I guess what I'm saying is that what she said was wrong, even though it was also true.  Somehow. At least, I think that's what I'm saying. I'm not really good with complex emotions or deep thought.

Maybe I'll just go lie down now, with a full belly, on the back of the comfy couch in our nice, warm house. That will feel good. And, now, also bad, somehow. Dangit!

-Shane

Vicious Dog Warning

That mean little dog Mom and Dad are petsitting barked at my squirrels, and scared them away.

I'm not happy. :(

-Shane

It Wasn't Me!

I don't know what it is.

I don't know how it got there.

But, it's not my fault.

I promise.

-Shane

p.s. - if you could move it, that would be great. It's kind of in the spot where I usually lay on my back and play dead.

I'm a Helper!

Ohboy ohboy ohboy ohboy! Mom went shopping today. I love shopping day. It's like she brings me a whole smorgasbord of new smells, all neatly packaged in plastic bags. Today was even better, though, since she brought us a new bag of cat food.

I love cat food.

While she was busy putting groceries away, I helped out by opening the bag of cat food. I'm good at stuff like that. For some reason she didn't seem to appreciate my help. But, that's ok. I got to eat. That's all that really matters.

-Shane

Powerless

Nimrod said that power comes from the remote control. I tried to harness it by laying right in front of the remote. You know - so I could absorb the power. I didn't get any power, though. I just got hollered at. Apparently fat and fur block the signal. Who knew?

- Shane

I Aim to Please

Mom was complaining about how her cable bill always includes some extra little charge every month. She seemed really frustrated about it. So, I decided to get rid of the cable bill for her. Problem solved! I am such a good helper.

- Shane

p.s. - here is a video of me helping. Boy, I sure am a handsome guy.

Kitchen Classes

Sometimes I like to play dead in the middle of the kitchen floor while Mom is making supper. I'm not sure why I do it. It is also a complete mystery to her. I have learned that I make a really good speed bump. I have also learned that people don't like running into speed bumps when they're carrying pots of boiling water.

Learning is fun. Sometimes it's also hot, loud, and scary. Maybe I'll try playing dead somewhere else next time.

-Shane

I'm Number One!

If there was a prize for snuggling, I would win it. I could compete in contests. I don't want to brag, but I'm pretty sure I'm the best snuggler in the world. That's probably cause I practice so much. It takes dedication to be this good.

-Shane