Rising From the Bottomfeeder

Bonjour. I am Moniser Jacques Poisson. Or, as my people call me, Mr. Fishy.

I am zee newest member of zee tank, and grateful to have made your acquaintance.

Despite what you might have heard, I am not a member of any resistance movement, uprising, or revolt. Honest. Sure, I spend zee most time cleaning scum from zee castle, as if in metaphorical protest about zee scum to be found in zee corroded halls of government. But, zat means nossing. Zat means absolutely nossing.

I am just zee humble, lowly fishy. Nossing to see here.

-Jacques

Guest Post : McCoy the Fish

Whazzup!!?? I'm new here, and I think I'm going to like it. At first I was all, like, "whoa! I'm in a net. Now I'm in a bag. Now I'm moving around a lot. Now my bag is floating in a different tank than I've ever seen before. Now I'm swimming in new water, dudes!"

But now, I've, like totally come to love my new home. There's another new fish who came here at the same time I did (and in the same bag!). He doesn't say much. But, I'm totally digging my new tankmate Amy. She's like, superhot. A little bit of a bubble brain, maybe, but I'm not one to complain. Best of all, she's nice. And funny. She does this thing where she pretends she forgets where she is and what she's doing.

Hi.Lar.I.Ous. For real. Though, it is starting to get a bit old...

Anyway - later dudes. I'm going to go catch some O2 in the bubble curtain and then do some laps through the castle.

Peace Out.

- McCoy

Guest Post: Lexi the Dog

I didn't meant to upset the kitties. I only barked at the squirrels because I thought they were getting too close, and might hurt the people. I'm a brave protector! As for Princess - I never even saw her. I didn't know she existed. Why is she so mad at me? Is she always like that?

I'm glad that these people let me stay here, and the little girls were kind of fun to play with. But, most of all, I just want my own mom and dad back. It makes me sad when I'm not with them, and even more so since the cats kept staring and hissing at me.

- Lexi

Guest Post : Amiga

Hello,
My name is Amiga.  I have recently become a member of a family that I believe you are familiar with, The Chalupas.  In fact I recently got to meet some of your own family when they came to visit mine.  I have never had a family before and I am really enjoying it.  I have also never had a friend before, but after watching your people and mine find so much joy and companionship in one another I admit it does sound kind of nice.  I think it would be lots of fun to have a real bosom buddy!  Just think of the hair ties we could chase! Anyway, my family always enjoys reading your blog and so I have been reading along as well.  I think that I have a bit in common with each one of you.  I definitely think Charles and I could have some very interesting intellectual conversations.  Nimrod and I have a similar past, I was also used to roaming free.  But, I am afraid that I can not share his affection for it!  Outside is cold and lonely and sometimes you end up injured with no one to care for you!  That is what happened to me and now that I have found this lovely, warm home filled with people who love and feed me, I am not going near the outside ever again!  I am perfectly happy to sit on my couch basking in the sunshine watching the outside from the inside.  I hope this letter finds you all well and I look forward to hearing more of what is going on in your world.

Sincerely,
Amiga

Guest Post : Mea Culpa From Big Mike

It has recently come to our attention that some feline members of the household might have misinterpreted the comments of an over zealous fellow squirrel named Rocco.

I'm here to extend my deepest apologies and to let all interested parties know that Rocco will no longer be communicating on behalf of our organization.

Mr. Cheeks himself, our leader, wants to be sure that you understand how deep our respect for your family is, and how much he wants our friendship to continue. And, mostly, how much he doesn't ever want to have a run in with Princess. Ever.

Our apologies, again. We beg your forgiveness and mercy. May all your seeds be sunflower, and your feeders be always full.

- Big Mike

Guest Post : Da Squirrels

Hey... bozos! Is it not enuf that we put up with da fluffy cat starin' at us all the time like some kinda moron? Is it not enuf that we learned the goofy flag language from the tuff cat? Is it not enuf that the humans call us cute? (Yeah. We can hear ya out here.)

We put up with all this nonsense for all dese months, and now wadda we get? Bupkis. That's what. Dese feeders ain't gonna fill themselves, ya know.

Chop chop, people. We gonna need some more sunflower seeds, pronto, or it ain't gonna be pretty.

Capeesh?

- Rocco

Guest Post : Amy The Fish

Um. Hello? It's me again. Amy. My castle is still knocked over. And, for some reason, no one is giving me fresh food. Even when I swim to the top and do my pretty little swirl. It's been a while. I'm not sure how long. I'm not very good at keeping track of time. I just wanted to let you know.

I really need to remember to let people know that I'm not getting fresh food anymore. Even when I swim to the top and do my pretty little swirl.

Hey - that's funny. It's my castle. And it's knocked down. Wonder how that happened.

Oh well. I'll just swim to the top and do my pretty little swirl, and then I'll get some fresh food, which makes everything better.

- Amy

Guest Post : Amy the Fish

It was horrible! I saw my life flash before my eyes! Then it was all white, and then I saw stripes. The water around me filled with fur and claws. My little castle even got knocked over. It is a sad, sad day.

I'm hungry. I wonder what's over here? Hey, how'd my castle get knocked over? Bloop, bloop, bloop...

- Amy the Fish